update.

friday.

commonly i'd find myself in rust. questioning why so many trends begin to die after months of use.

but why can't i find the time and strength to love myself. belligerent thoughts that reoccur from summer beyond. growing deep inside grassy roots balled up behind trusting leaves.

in time i'll watch all my friends turn in to alcoholics, pedophiles, homosexuals, deadbeats, failures, problematic solutes to this society creating more riot, following violent ends, to beginnings that are envied by many. the change that we all live for.

in time i'll watch you grow,

in time i'll watch you die,

in time i'll watch you live.

and repeat over and over again.

when the wallflower looks in cold deep waters like once dreamt about in nightmares on a warm random night.

reading, no researching how we should find ourselves in years from now.

today was supposed to be the day i sleep for once.

so was 4 years ago.

but i guess the times come when the suns past.

cause i'm not sad. i'm not feeling any distraught, or lostlessness, lonelyness, loathness, sulking up balls of cheap brand paper into aerodynamic strings of creases to make flight those forgetful pasts.

i've let go.

i'm still growing. it's a process.

let's find common sense. let's stop trying to be the windy day. and be the silly flock.

nature's best is nature's rest. .. of its kind.

"someday maybe i'll understand, what it is like to read minds."